Smut Effect
by Draguna Doragon
Summary: This is a challenge fic. You send me the pairings you want to see, i'll write them a oneshot. across mass effect 1, 2 and 3. M for a reason, the only thing i won't write is Yuri, because i'm no good at it. Het and Yaoi is fine.
1. Sparatus and Emma

Ok, just want to explain how this will work. You review me the pairing you want me to do a one shot for and I'll do publish it. Review the pairings so other people can see what has been requested already. Just to get the ball rolling I'm going to start with a pairing I don't expect anyone will request.

*pulls back the curtain* And it starts!

"I hate paper work." Sparatus sighed again, pushing aside another thick policy he'd had to sign into the 'done' pile to his left. Too bad the pile of 'not done' paper work to his right was as high as his shoulders. He groaned again and sat back in his chair. the fake sun had set in the citadel hours ago. It was the wee hours of the night now and he had hours more to go before he could finally leave his luxurious office and go get some shut eye. It wasn't glamorous being a councillor. Everyone came to you to sign this, approve that, deal with the latest inter-species incident before a war starts, and finish your damn paper work before the next day, where your to do list would double. He sighed again and flexed his signing hand. It ached...

Sparatus knew that this is what came with representing his race in the council, protecting Turian rights everywhere and being prepared for anything. It was an honour he had fought tooth and nail in debates, elections and behind the curtain to achieve. He'd give up his seat over his cold rotting carapace. But it was harder to be motivated about his iconic role in the galaxy as of late. "It's all the damn paper work." He pushed up from his desk and walked over to the large window overlooking the presidium. It was such a soothing sight during the day, and enchanting at night. The way the water rippled around the gushing fountains, glowing under the night lamps running down the bridges.

Yes, he had lost his motivation as of late. His temper had sharpened, and shortened, and he found himself hiding in his office more often than not. Doing paper work. _How do the other councillors stay driven with the tedious nature of paper work and ridiculous petty issues we get dumped with?_ It made him long for his military days. There was paper work, true, but only mission reports. There was more action and excitement than his proverbial desk job. He was proud of it, but the joy had been taken from him. He'd brokered this topic with Tevos, the Asari councillor and she had actually given him a serious answer. With a lecherous smirk...

"_You need to find something to unwind with off the clock. Personally, I enjoy that new assistant you hired for me. She's very good."_ Sparatus pinched his nose sighed again. When he opened his icy blue eyes and saw his tired reflection in the mirror. Even with the agile and striking lines of his white markings, his exhaustion was obvious. His mandibles flared every so as he sighed. Again. _Tevos_. He shook his head and chuckled. It was her damn idea to show the citadel how the council promoted inter-species cooperation by having an assistant of a different species to each councillor. So he had hired a bright eyed ambitious young Turian woman by the name of Gahlia Turina. She is from a good Palavan family with relatives in the Turian military. She interviewed very well, and he would have liked to have her as _his_ assistant. But no. He had to hire her for that damn Asari woman. And now he knew they were having relations, it's even worse! "It's just unprofessional." He barked to one side and folded his arms over his chest. He'd actually gone to her for a serious answer to his restlessness and she'd divulged that she 'unwound' in the arms of the woman he hired for her! He'd quickly ended _that_ conversation and made his excuses to leave.

But he was wound up so tight after that conversation. All he could think about was how frustrated he was, in many ways, and he actually envied the fact that Tevos had an effective 'outlet', and he didn't.

Sparatus had never gotten round to finding a wife and having a family. Being the Turian councillor meant he also couldn't just go down to Purgatory and 'release his tensions' as and when he needed to. In the military he could, because no one knew him. hell, he'd had his pick of women back in his army days. He chuckled at that, remembering one incident when he was caught in a broom cupboard with two sisters...his unit commander had simply given him a thumbs up and told him not to be late for drills in an hour. The baritone rumbles of his fond but brief laughter filled the office for a moment. Then he sighed. Again. "Trust the damn Asari to suggest the one thing I can't have as a source of relief."

At that moment there was a soft rasping on his door which dragged him from his thoughts. The proud Turian grabbed the hem of his tunic and made sure he looked immaculate before pressing the door release on his desk. His eyes fell on a familiar sight, both pleasant and unpleasant at the same time.

As part of their damn 'we're all friends really' scheme, Udina had hired him a human assistant. Emma Jones. She was a young thing, with long brown hair shimmering down her back and big bright blue eyes. She wore the regulation uniform for a human to wear in the embassies. A white dress that came down to her ankles and the sleeves down to her wrists. It had a high neck and a thick black panel running from her collar to her feet. She was holding a tray of steaming dextro tea.

She was an unpleasant sight as she was a human with access to his office, but she was a pleasant sight because she went out of her way to provide him with dextro coffee in the morning, and tea at night. Perhaps she'd heard his walking around his office and thought he was heading off home? He'd asked her about this service she insisted on providing him once, and remembered her response.

"_Coffee to get you all perked up before you start, and tea before you leave. You know, so you don't stay up all night when you get home!" _ She giggled soon after that, like she always did when she spoke to him in her nervous, almost breathless voice.

Nervous, timid, shy.

_She's actually quite loyal to me…_she never left the office until he did, and she was always here when he arrived. With the hours _he_ kept, when did she sleep or have a life of her own?

"Good evening councillor Sparatus." She bowed her head briefly and walked up to his desk.

He made an acknowledging grunt in the back of his throat, and sat at his desk once more, looking at the large pile of paper work he'd managed to avoid for all of ten minutes. He pulled the next policy he had to read and sign off the top of the 'to do' pile and set it out before him. His eyes flicked up and caught her rosy lips smiling at him, until she realised she'd been caught and she flushed and made herself busy pouring him a cup of tea. She poured it from a large tea pot, and a large mug. It was black, with hand painted yellow letters around the circumference saying 'Councillor Sparatus'. She even put a smiley face after it too.

This little childish quirk of hers made him smile to himself, and thought that tea actually might be a good idea. It might even lighten his mood.

He watched her pour his steaming tea into the large mug before him, a desk separating them.

"Miss Jones." She flinched at the sound of her name.

"Y-yes Councillor Sparatus?"

"It is technically the next day. Why are you still here?" he palmed the steaming cup of tea and inhaled deeply. Oh, he did enjoy Chopperberry tea. It was a mild fruit and of course, dextro based. No death in a cup for him.

"Oh, well I had some work to do in the office and I do like to serve you tea before you leave for the night. So you sleep well councillor." She smiled at him again, and then looked to his pile of papers. "Oh...you're not leaving anytime soon, are you?"

"Uuuuuuurrrrrh." He groaned and held his brow plate in his fingers. "No. Alas, but the tea will help. Thank you."

"It is my pleasure councillor." She bowed her head to him again and waited to be dismissed. Sparatus released his brow and looked up at the woman. You know, it suddenly struck him that having had her working for him for several months now, he didn't know a damn thing about her. well, her credentials sure. And she was very efficient in her work. But who was this woman that stayed after hours to serve him caffeinated beverages and stand between him and the petty masses? He'd caught this timid human once staring down a hissing Turian C-Sec officer that wasn't happy about being taken off his case by the councillor. He'd been ready to charge through the door and give the little pipsqueak a damn piece of his mind, when he heard her calmly, and cautiously, tear him a new one.

"_Forgive the assumption officer, but I was under the impression that you were capable of reading the letter of explanation that was sent to you, and also understood the chain of command in regards to your investigations regarding other delegates. If councillor Sparatus says no, then you should be damn well honoured that he took the time to even look at your request. He's an incredibly busy man with galactic issues to deal with on a daily basis. You're concerns about the Vorcha forging id's is something that shouldn't even have gotten to the councillor's desk. Respect that it was and he took the time to address it. The answer is no, now return to your station and do your duty to your councillor, your people and your job, officer."_

_She tore that officer a new one. _

"Miss Jones? I find myself curious about you." he interlocked his fingers on top of the policy and looked up at her with an intense gaze. The woman tensed and her hands pressed against her middle. Well that made her nervous. She was blushing as well, he noted.

"Well, erm, how can I help you councillor?"

"How old are you?" She blinked down at him and gulped.

"I am 23, councillor Sparatus."

"You can call me Sparatus." He was not going to keep his patience for long if every sentence she gave him ended with councillor. "Where are you from Miss Jones?"

"I am from the citadel...Sparatus." She fussed her hands together over her front. "You may call me Emma at your leisure. I was born and raised here. My father works in C-Sec in the Admin department. My mother volunteers in the refugee centre at the docks."

"I see. Admirable work." He nodded and sat back in his chair, still looking her over. "What made you want to work for me? You knew on your application that you would be working for me. The Turian councillor, not Udina." She tucked her long brown hair behind her ears and took a deep breath. Sparatus thought this actually was quite cruel, putting her on the spot like this, but he was curious about her now. she was at least a distraction to his mountain of paperwork. "Emma?"

"My desire to do my part for society is strong. My father taught me well." She gulped. "He is Turian." Well, Sparatus hadn't been expecting that. "He married my mother when I was 2 and adopted me as his own. You might know him? Haron? Works in security?"

"Yes, I know of him." Sparatus actually found a new respect for this woman. She was raised by a Turian. That explains her sense of duty and dedication. That's why she went to battle for him so soon after being hired. It also explains her driven work ethic and how she got this position so young. She was good at her job. "Good man." He then lifted his cup and took a deep sip. He actually groaned softly. It was just that good. "I suppose that explains why you brought me dextro tea and coffee from day one, then?"

"Yes, I was also raised on dextro food." His brow plate lifted at that. "I ate it as a young child by accident and got very ill. When I recovered, it seemed like I became resist to any allergic reaction to it and I enjoy the taste. Fewer calories in dextro food." She giggled, and then blushed. Well, that was a silly tit-bit of information that he didn't need to know.

"You're not allergic to dextro?" he 'huh-ed' and looked down into his tea. Suddenly the thought of Tevos returned to the forefront of his mind.

"_You need to find something to unwind with off the clock. Personally, I enjoy that new assistant you hired for me. She's very good."_ He swatted that away and cleared his throat. "Tell me more you." He left the question open and waved a hand towards a spare chair for her to take. She did so and sat at the other side of the desk to him, hands cupped together over her lap. He sipped the tea again and smiled through his mandibles. She must have taken that as her cue because she began.

"Well I enjoy going down to the shooting range with my father." His brow plate lifted. Her personnel file said nothing about been proficient with weaponry. "I of course have a licence for my sidearm." She added, thinking that was the reason for his alarm, not realising he was actually impressed with her.

"It has been many years since I have fired a gun." He sighed.

"Yes, you were a general in the Turian infantry."

"You have done your homework." He chuckled. Well this girl was thorough, wasn't she? looks like he wouldn't be catching her unawares after all. _Just like a Turian._

"Do you...miss it?" he caught her curious gaze and had to smirk at her. well, he might be the one that opened up this dialogue of questioning, but she appeared determined to return the gesture.

"Yes. But...I couldn't go back. I do more good here with a pen and paper than I do with a gun." He barked a laugh and sipped more of his tea. "It's not as fun, but much more effective."

"You _look_ like it's fun." He raised his brow plate at her, then the pile of paperwork, then back at her. "Well." Emma chuckled nervously and tucked a stray lock of brown hair behind her ear. "Not the paper work part."

"Clearly."

"But when you are debating you look so..." she bit her bottom lip and looked like she dare not continue. But he was curious now. damn if he wasn't curious now.

"So what?" when she still hesitated he put his cup down and leaned with his elbows on the table. "Emma?"

"Magnificent." She whispered and looked down at her hands. "You run mental circles around everyone and never lose face or pride when you do it. You look so alive when you're making your stand in the council chambers." She timidly looked up to gauge his reaction. He kept his face stoic, intending to get more out of her before she could run away in embarrassment. "So you look like you're having fun."

"If only all my time was fighting in the council chambers." He traced the circumference of his cup with one of his dark talons. "You appear to admire me, Emma." He stated, watching her every reaction intently. She nodded, cheeks holding a permanent flush now. but she had obviously decided to lay in the bed she'd made, as she faced him with determination now.

"Yes sir." She nodded. "I do."

"I am honoured." He nodded and found his gaze...wandering...from what Tevos and Udina said when they 'regarded human women' at conferences, Emma would be deemed as quite attractive. For a human. Her figure was tall and curved at her hips, which looked very supportive, dipped in at her waist and out against around her breasts and shoulders. The breasts he couldn't really comment on, though they looked an average size. Turian's didn't have mammary glands after all. But strong shoulders, he could appreciate. Her neck was elegant as well...and her cheek bones were agile enough for his liking. Her blue eyes deep and burning with passion.

_By the spirits...am I really thinking about...could I even..._ he flickered his eyes down into his tea and couldn't believe where his mind had gone. He could even feel 'movement' down south of his equator.

"Have I...said something wrong?" he looked up again then and saw the human starting to panic. "I meant no offence by what I said councillor. I'm sorry I just-" she started to get up from her chair and make for the door. She looked mortified. Emma turned to run for the door, but Sparatus was quicker. Like an old reflex he vaulted over the desk and chased her to the door. He grabbed her shoulders before she could reach for the door panel and pressed her against the side wall. he looked down into her alarmed blue eyes and thought hard about what he should do next.

"You have no reason to be sorry Emma. I am not offended."

_She's human. She's human. She's human. She's-_ "Are you attached to anyone?" Emma cocked her head to one side, not fighting his grip on her shoulders in the slightest and raised a brow at him. that was so out of the blue that it robbed her of her alarm.

"No c-"

"Sparatus."

"No Sparatus." He slowly and gently smoothed his hands from her shoulders to hold her biceps. She looked to one of his hands on her arm, and then slowly looked back up at the councillor. There was a realisation in her eyes, and he couldn't turn back now.

"Could you be..._discretely_ attached to a Turian?" it seemed like an eternity before her rosy lips formed the words.

"Only if it's _you_, Sparatus." His mandibles tugged to one side then. So, she'd been harbouring _those _feelings for him, had she? interesting.

"I have never been with a human before." He took his hands off her and locked the door. That action was telling in itself. "But you already professed to being resistant to dextro 'substances', so I imagine there is no need for medical assistance." Before he could continue a pair of very timid hands rested on the rim of his carapace. Her fingers were warm and held onto him for support as she reached up. She was both eager and willing then.

"Are you sure?" She seemed afraid of the answer, but her lips were already so very close to his mandibles, he couldn't turn back now.

"Yes. As long as you understand there will be rules to this 'attachment'."

"Of course Sparatus." The way she whispered his name in that moment was something he would never forget. It tore away the rest of his Turian caution and he pressed her against the wall again with his body. He also pressed their mouths together. He'd observed Turian human couples kissing like this, and was curious how it would feel. Her lips were soft and warm, and moulded to his harder but malleable plating. This was a pleasant sensation, but it was exciting when she released mewling noises and slid her tongue against his. That felt like sparks were dancing in his mouth. Hers wasn't as flat as his, or as long, but it appeared to be very flexible. At some point Emma had hitched a leg around his hip and her hands smoothed over his mandibles and neck. He growled, so hungry to drink her all in, he tore his mouth from hers and pressed it to her neck. She craned her head to one side so he could enjoy her neck as much as he wanted, which he did. He nipped, licked and sucked down her neck and across her collar bone. Then he realised the dress was in the damn way. "Oh, Sparatus. Don't stop." The sound of her begging was delightful. Turian women _never _beg. Could he make her do it again?

"I won't." He ground and looped her other leg around his waist. "I'm a little rusty though, so bare with m-." He chuckled against her as she latched onto his mouth before he could even finish. Well, wasn't she smitten now? he took a good hold of her rump, getting an approving mewl for his troubles, and held her back tightly. Emma pulled back and held his neck frantically as she was suddenly pulled away from the wall. she saw they were heading for the desk and relaxed in his arms. He dropped her backside on the table and fisted at her skirt. "Now, you take this off Miss Jones." He hadn't meant to address her like that, but she seemed to respond instantly with a hungry grin. Those teeth trapped her bottom lip and she looked ready to melt under him. "You're not holding me up Miss Jones. I'm a very busy man."

"Yes councillor." She whimpered, kicking off her shoes first and then pulling the skirt of her dress up her legs. He watched intently, finding her long legs very attractive. Very Turian. When she shuffled the skit up to her waist he took charge and yanked it up and over her head. The dress landed near the door and he looked intently down at her quivering body. The piles of paper work at her sides caged her in for his delight. His attention was taken from the wide curve of her hips when he realised she was taking her bra off.

"Here, allow me Miss Jones." He grabbed her panties and slid them down her legs. She didn't have a carapace or hard plating, but there was something enthralling about how soft and warm she was. He wanted to run his hands over her for hours. So smooth. _And now mine._

"Am I acceptable now councillor?" Emma caught his fiery gaze and saw his smirk pull his mandibles open.

"You look so fragile and warm. You are so exposed." He brought a hand to her cheek and she nuzzled against it. "Are you more or less sensitive than a Turian woman?"

"Find out." oh, she was challenging him now? well, now he _had_ to put her in her place. he let his hand slide down her face, trace her neck with his talons and accidentally brushed the back of his fingers over one of her nipples. The moan she released both startled and excited him. could she do that again? He palmed her breasts and pinched her dusky perk between his fingers. Yes, she _could_ do it again. He wondered what her peaks tasted like, but his resolve was coming undone just looking at her whimpering on his desk. His plates had long since parted and unsheathed his cock in his pants. It was uncomfortable, and he knew how to rectify that.

"I have just the test for that Miss Jones. Let me move you." She found herself shoved further onto the desk on her back, with her hips almost hanging off the end of the table. She held her bent legs up and apart for his pleasure. Her lust drunk eyes watched how his supple fingers pulled his uniform apart and disrobed himself quickly. Once he was finally naked he smoothed his hands down her legs and rested them on her hips. before he continued he realised she was drinking his form in.

"Can I touch you?"

"Yes." He paused his advances, despite his throbbing cock, and let her push up on one hand to stroke his face. That gentle hand caressed his dark brown neck and explored the natural groves of his carapace. Then it went lower...he growled when she tried to touch his cock and moved his pelvis out of her way. "There will be time for that, but right now I need for this to continue. Sparatus would be inside if he didn't find out if she was just as soft on the inside as she was to his hands. Would she be as warm? He saw she was sufficiently lubricated already, and smirked when she parted her legs wide for him. "Good girl, Miss Jones." He gripped her hip with one hand and parted her slick tresses with the other.

There was a moment when he thought about things like, would he fit? What shape would she be like on the inside? Would she still have a reaction to him when he came? Was he taking advantage of her?

But she seemed to grow impatient with him when a hand fisted at the rim of his carapace. He looked deep into her eyes and saw she was burning, drowning in the anticipation. She wanted this as much as he did.

"Fuck! Yes." He would have found her sudden use of profanities amusing, if he wasn't losing his mind at that moment. He'd sank his cock inside her to the hilt and couldn't believe how she felt around him! Soft, warm, and _wet_. It felt like molten walls spasmed and clung to him all over. It literally took his breath from him.

"No wonder so many of my kind form relationships with yours. I think you've just ruined Turian women for me." He panted, almost looking pained, as he opened his eyes to look down at her. Turian women were warm inside, and soft_er_ than usual, but not so wet. There weren't so tight either, or as easy to mould to his every movement. Her hips were capable of a greater variance of angle as well, increasing the depths he could reach inside her.

"Any time, councillor." Emma grabbed the back of his head and seemed to no longer take the timid approach to him. He started rocking his hips into hers. Every time she strangled a scream of delight in her throat, every time she clawed at his carapace in delirious passion, and every time she mewled his name, he wished he was a Drell. If only he could recall every time she responded so openly to his touches in perfect detail. "Oooo oooo Sparatus!" Emma arched against him on the desk and gripped the other side of the desk for leverage. His cup of tea rolled off the table and the massive piles of done and unfinished paperwork littered the floor. The whole desk creaked with their love making. Their pace was so furious now he no longer cared if the whole citadel could hear them. He started speaking Turian, and comparing her body to the beauty of the spirits. He didn't know she could understand Turian...

He griped her hips with both hands now and piston into her with a wicked pace.

"Emma." He groaned, his sub-tones becoming shaker as he felt himself getting closer to sweet release. He watched how her breasts jiggled with every pound of his hips into hers. The way her lips parted and the melody of her moaning and mewling. Her hands ghosted over his chest, caressed his face, gripped the desk, like she didn't know what to do with herself she was in so much pleasure. Sparatus felt the strangest sensation in the world. She seemed to quiver around his cock, her walls becoming even tighter and her body arched against the table. For a horrible moment he thought she was having a reaction to him after all, until he realised she was howling his name and holding him even closer to her. _so that's how a human cums?_

It felt fantastic. The added wetness and tightness of her core was milking him for all he was worth. His thrusts became choppy and desperate, until finally he joined her in bliss. He clawed at the desk at her side and gripped her hips so hard his talons just broke through the skin. but she didn't squeal at him in pain. She held him as he swam in the seas of release and came inside her.

Sparatus finally opened his eyes when the last waves of his pleasure had finished blurring the edges of his mind, and looked down into the warm blue eyes of his secretary. For the first time in a _long _time he was totally relaxed and satisfied. He even wore a dopy grin across his mandibles and nuzzled her hand when she reached up to touch him.

"I think you just ruined humans for me too. although..." she blushed and bit her bottom lip in that maddening way she did. "...I never really found them attractive in the first place."

"How convenient." Sparatus chuckled and carefully pulled out of her. "No side effects?" he asked cautiously, helping his softening cock back into his sheath. Emma didn't look put off by this, thankfully.

"Well, yes." She giggled and slid off his table. "The room is a mess." She pointed to the spilt tea and scattered paperwork. "And I'm wondering what happens next." Tentatively they redressed and let the question hang in the air. Sparatus was the only one who could answer that question, so after he thought out it, he realised he couldn't fathom not having her again. That couldn't be the only time he got to taste such bliss with her. he wouldn't allow it.

"We need to be discrete, due to my position." He started, sorting through some of the paper work on the floor. "However, I would be open to a private relationship."

"Relationship?" Emma sounded hopeful, handing him more 'done' paperwork to put on his desk. She watched him trace the claw marks on the table and they both blushed. How were they going to explain that? Sparatus caught her eyes and knew what she was really asking him.

"One step at a time." He traced her cheek with the back of his talons, and almost fell over when she jumped him. her lips pressed to his and things quickly escalated into Emma being pressed against the glass of his window and Sparatus attacking her neck again. She had bite marks there, which showed that she belonged to him. he didn't realise it yet, but he felt like he'd claimed her for himself. The thought of her being with anyone else was damming to him. "You can't see anyone else."

"I don't want to." She whimpered when he palmed at her breast through her dress.

"You really are sensitive." He chuckled and licked her cheek. "And I am insatiable. I've always been that way. It's how I became a councillor. I know what I want."

"I want you." She was so brave, admitting that so soon to his face. He had to admire her for that. he smirked and nipped at her chin.

"I'll hold you to that." he chuckled huskily against her ear. "Daily." She whimpered in his arms, astounding him further. She was so responsive to him too. "Emma." He growled her name into her ear and she moaned against him.

To both his surprise and his delight, it seems he was being quite 'responsive' as well. He fisted at her dress and yanked it up to her hips. oh her hips. "You're hips are so supportive." He chuckled. "Where did your panties go?"

"Couldn't find them." Emma whimpered, her chocolaty locks sexily dishevelled around her hungry face. "I was hoping they'd turn up."

"Well, how convenient miss Jones. I have _need_ of you again." She responded by hitching a leg over his hips.

He was smitten with this human. He'd not felt so invigorated or so alive in years. One night with her, and he felt 20 years younger. _Humans aren't so bad after all. _Sparatus was already yanking at the fly of his trousers, feverishly trying to release his length and be inside her wet heat again, when the door opened.

His heart stopped, as did Emma's, as they turned to look at the open doorway.

"Oh, I see." Tevos covered Gahlia's eyes and pushed her out of the doorway. The Asari's shoulders were bouncing and she was trying to bit her lips, to stop her laughter escaping.

Trying being the word. "I'll be in the office in a minute. Meet me there." her embarrassed secretary scurried off and Tevos walked into the office and closed the door. She then closed her eyes as Sparatus and Emma hurried to right themselves. "Well, I'm glad you found yourself a little bit of happiness Sparatus." She chuckled and opened her eyes again, content they would be decent again. "You realise it's 5am, yes? Office workers and other delegates will be arriving soon? Who might _hear_ you?"

"Thank you, that is enough." Emma was making herself busy collecting the paperwork. She caught the turian's eyes and blushed. "Miss Jones, you will help me right my paperwork and then we will be dismissed for the rest of the day to rest."

"Together?" Tevos added, unable to stop herself from teasing him, and received a molten glare. He even went as far to storm over to her and point at her smirking face.

"This is private. You will tell _no one_ about our relationship."

"Relationship?" she chuckled and looked at the human. "So not just office fucking then?"

"None of your business." He ground out, so embarrassed. The Asari councillor now had blackmail material against him. "Discretion is the better part of valour, councillor." He reminded.

"Oh really Sparatus! I'm surprised at you." Tevos wagged her finger at his face. "We've been friends for _years_. I wouldn't tattle on you. besides, I told you about me and Gahlia first, didn't I?"

"...yes."

"Exactly." The fierce woman then set her gaze on the timid human. "Will you be needed a doctor?"

"N-no." Sparatus held his face in embarrassment.

"Leave her alone and go play with your own woman."

"Unlike you, I do that at night in the privacy of my own home." She giggled at the shade she was making the good old fashioned Turian general turn. He deserved it though. He'd been literally caught with his pants down. "I suggest you do the same. If you want to keep your relationship private that is."

"Thank you for all your advice." He mocked his college and backed her out of his office. "I will speak with you soon." Beep, he locked the door. Sparatus sighed and forced himself to look at Emma. She looked just as embarrassed and out of sorts as he did. "Let's get this paper work back into order on my desk, then go home." Her blush intensified. "Separately." He added quickly. He watched her delicate hands touch her thick brown hair behind her ears. a habit she had, it seems.

"That's today planned...what about tomorrow?" the Turian cleared his throat and collected himself the best he could.

"I expect you to be as efficient and dedicated to your job as you usually are Miss Jones." He then hushed his voice, as if afraid Tevos would reappear at any moment. "Then after hours we can be intimate at my place."

"Yes sir." She positively bounced around the office, smiling from ear to ear as they righted the paper work and prepared to leave. Before the door to his office opened and he lost the opportunity he pressed his forehead to hers and inhaled deeply. "I'm looking forward to tomorrow councillor."

"I'm not." He then chuckled at her confused expression. "I'm looking forward to tomorrow night."


	2. Garrus and Male Shepard part one

Chapter 2

There have been some fantastic reviews to this little outlet of mine! I do have to however admit some of my limitations! I can only write twosomes (tried to write a threesome once and people got ignored for ages) and I'm no good at yuri...but pairs of het and pairs of yaoi I can do ^.^

So this chapter is inspired by Ireadsgood, and Guest who both voted for Male Shepard and Garrus. I did go a little over board, so this chapter is the plot, next chapter is the smut! Enjoy!

*pulls the curtain back*

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_Oh dear spirits...did he just..._

Garrus Vakarian snapped his head to one side. Shepard had him separated from his beloved console, so he couldn't do his usual fob off of needing to do some _urgent_ calibrations...

He was in fact, leaning his lower back against said console, with his arms folded over his toned chest and a devilish smirk across his face.

The Turian couldn't bring his icy blue eyes to look at him. Instead he looked off to one side, fixated by his weapons rack. Despite the many and traumatic shocks Garrus had been dealt in his career...never had he encountered _this_ before. He'd been talking to the commander one minute, then caught in a social minefield the next!

_"It was Brutal. After nine rounds the judge called it a draw. There were a lot of unhappy betters in the training room. We-er, ended up holding a tie breaker in her quarters. I had reach but she had flexibility. More than one way to work off stress, I guess."_

_"It sounds like your carrying some tension. Maybe I could help you get rid of it?"_

_"I didn't think you'd feel like sparing commander?"_

_"What if we skipped to the tie breaker? We could test your reach, and my flexibility?" _

And that was the whammy he'd been dealt with. His mental shut down must have taken too long, as the sexy smirk on his commander's face dropped into an embarrassed and awkward smile. An odd expression to see on his fearless leader. "Sorry Garrus. I misunderstood. Don't worry I won't mention it again." He then cleared his throat, pushed off from the console and hurried past the stunned Turian. "As you were Garrus. I'm sure you have some vital calibrations to do."

"Yea, calibrations." Garrus turned and finally spoke just as the door behind him closed. "...well...that could have gone..." he didn't know how to finish that. better? Worse? "No, couldn't have gone worse." He sighed and walked back over to the console, but didn't touch the digital display.

_Sheppard just came on to me._ He gulped, his mandibles twitching with the movement. _I guess I brought up sex as a way of blowing off steam...but I told him I had it with a woman._ He lifted his hand to start working, then dropped it back onto the console edge and stared blankly into the orange screen. _Hell, I didn't even know he was gay! Never mind into other species..._

He'd known Sheppard for years, since their days chasing Seran, and not _once _had he realised that his best friend was both gay and into _him_.

_No, he's not attracted to me specifically. We are very good friends and I must have thought I was suggesting something. That's all. Even __he__ said it was a misunderstanding. So I should just forget it ever happened._ Garrus nodded and started entering commands into the console.

For all of 30 seconds. It hit him like a train to the side of the head that he had _never_ seen Shepard romantically or otherwise involved with anyone. Hell, he's seen people try to become involved with him, but Shepard always turned them down in that nice guy way he has. Garrus stood up straight and started counting off all the people he'd turned down on his six fingers. "Liara, Aria, so no Asari, Tali, Miranda, Kelly...oh hell..."

_How the __hell__ didn't I know he was gay?! He's turned down so many women these last 3 years it should have been obvious? Even I've blown off steam on shore leave...wait...shore leave._

Garrus thought back to the last time they swung by the citadel to relax and recharge moral as the ship underwent repairs. They went to purgatory and all got very drunk, of course. Most of the crew had picked up _someone_ to dance and take back to the ship for some 'blowing off steam', but not the commander. _He was sat at the bar with me all night...until that beautiful Turian dancer, what was her name, Kiala or something like that asked me to buy her a drink..._

Garrus pinched his flat nose and closed his eyes thinking hard. What did the commander do after that? it was mostly a blur due to the drinking, but he managed to bring the memory to the front of his mind.

_"Hay, Shepard, I'm going to show this fine woman my prise rifle, if you know what I mean."_

the memory paused in his mind, as he shook his body, disgusted with how drunk and how corny that line had sounded in hindsight. _There was an Asari pole dancer taking a break next to him, and giving him 'the look' so I thought he'd be leaving soon anyway. "Don't do anything I wouldn't do!" _ He sighed, trying to bring to the surface what the commander said to him.

_"...I think it's safe to say I won't do what you do Garrus. Have fun, and I'll see you tomorrow big guy." _

Garrus dropped his arms down by his sides. He saw the look on his commander's face as he staggered off with the hot Turian he'd pulled and started nuzzling her neck. _He looked sad...shit. By the spirits! He didn't go home with that Asari woman! I left him alone..._

Now he felt like shit. Then he was frustrated. "Well it's not _my _fault he never told me he wasn't into women. And he shouldn't have had any expectations from me anyway. I'm not gay." He started pressing the controls with more vigour than required and lowered his brow plate into a scowl.

Slowly though his anger dissipated, as did the pace of his calibrations. He plaid back in his mind his interactions with Shepard over the years, and felt very guilty. He _never_ had any expectations from him. Spirits, before today he'd never even hinted that he even liked men, never mind Garrus. Just when did Shepard start liking him in that way?

The scene of their reunion on omega came to mind. As he took off his helmet and dropped into the nearest table to sit on and put his feet up, a very cool pose he thought, he remembered the look on the commander's face.

_"Garrus! You're ok! What are you doing here?!" _ the commander had been so happy to see he was alive he started running towards him, but after a few steps he dug his heels in and stopped himself.

Garrus brought one hand up to the right side of his face, tracing the scars on his mandibles up to the synthetic covering over his upper jaw and ear. When he'd been shot with that missile he remembered the way Shepard shook him and begged him to hold on. he remembered come in and out of consciousness as his best friend carried him all the way back to the Normandy. _He was there when I woke up. he was there every time I woke up in the medical bay. _The only time he wasn't there was the time he decided he was getting out of the doc's probing reach and back to active duty. Even _that_ was only because Sheppard had an important meeting with Jacob.

There was no doubt that Garrus owed his life to Shepard. Many times over. From bullets, flaming husks to the synthetically reanimated Seran, he had nearly died so many times in battle. A life expected and accepted by any good soldier. But every time...Shepard had been by his side.

"I can't hold anything against him. I owe him so much; it wouldn't be fair to behave any differently around him. He's my best friend, and my commander. That hasn't changed, and never will." With that decided he felt at ease with the situation, and continued working. Shepard was such a professional, he would carry on as normal. So, so should he.

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Or so he thought.

Garrus sat in his quarters, scowling so hard, any moment he thought his icy glare alone would burn holes into the far metal wall. He had a rubber ball in his hands, a present from Jack of all people, and was hitting the far wall with it so hard, it stung his palm when he then caught it again.

"And to think, I used to _complain_ that I never had enough time to calibrate the man battery guns and algorithms between each battle." He grunted, throwing the ball harder against the wall. "Now I've been _pass over_ for the last _month_ I've got so much damn time on my hands I'm starting to miss C-sec." The ball sprang away from the wall and nearly hit him in the face, but he caught it at the last-minute. One of his talons pierced the ball however, and deflated the ball. He snarled and threw the rubber tatters to one side from his sat position against the wall, and hissed angrily. "Great, great now I don't even have the damn ball the throw."

The day after the 'incident', Garrus had reported to duty with the rest of the crew as another mission came up. Shepard was anything but predictable. He always chose a sniper and a biotic, unless all of each type were injured, then he'd pick Grunt. The only times in the past where Garrus hadn't been picked were very few, and usually because he was injured or off ship for some reason. Even so, he _still_ wasn't concerned when Shepard chose Jack and Legion.

He also wasn't concerned when Legion was chosen over his sniping skills for the third or fourth time. but a whole month's worth of missions later he hadn't gone off ship _once_. "Ha! And then there was the other day in the mess room." He snarled, kicking the edge of his bed.

He'd spotted Shepard sat on his own at the table with a plate of food, happily eating away and staring off into space. Garrus filled a tray with plain but safe dextro food and sat opposite the commander.

_"Long time no see Shepard. How's-"_

_"Sorry Garrus, I've got something to take care of."_

Shepard had scrambled off the table with his still mostly full place, hurried over to the bin, emptied it, dropped his plate on top of the bin and practically _ran _to the elevator. It was then Garrus felt his rage bubbling under his carapace. He'd had his suspicions, but now he knew. Shepard was _avoiding_ him. The look of shock on his face, and the flicker of fear in his steely blue eyes was so obvious. Probably because he'd been so engrossed in his own thoughts he hadn't seen the Turian coming before it was too late.

So that's why Garrus was sat on the floor of his room, having his own private tantrum. "I went out of my way to be professional and as normal as ever, and he just-just-spirits it's not even my fault!" he kicked the edge of his bed again and felt so angry, he didn't know what to do with himself. "Wait, _yes I do_."

Garrus might not be a good Turian when it came to following orders, but he knew Shepard. Sitting there and fester in his own frustrations wouldn't change anything. Shepard was so oblivious to the 'little things', he wouldn't know subtle if it walked up to him and slapped him silly.

Now, direct and to the point however, Shepard could deal with. And so did Garrus.

He put his black and blue armour on and activated his visualiser. He exhaled deeply, not wanting to look like a man on a rampage and forced himself to calmly open his door and walk slowly over to the elevator. It didn't take long for him to get to the top of the ship and press the intercom button to the commander's cabin. He waited patiently, knowing EDI would be telling the commander that Garrus was at the door. any moment the door would open, and he'd have a direct and to the point, very matter of fact and professional conversation with his commander, and best friend.

"I am sorry to inform you that the commander can't take visitors at the moment, and if you have a report to file, please send it to his e-account. Thank you."

Ok, the rage came back. Garrus scowled at the intercom, shrugged and pulled his pistol from his lower back. he then pressed the intercom button again with the barrel of the gun.

"Oh, EDI? Please _kindly_ inform the commander that if he _doesn't_ open this door right _now_...by the spirits I'll shoot it open."

"I will relay the message." The tecno tones of EDI did nothing to calm him. for the briefest of moments he thought that he was going to be ignored, and cocked the gun, but with a soft beep and a swish the doors opened. "You may now enter."

"About time." Garrus sheathed his pistol again and walked into the room, looking for the commander. "Shepard?" he couldn't see him anywhere. "Shepard I'm not in the mood for games." He growled, walking past the commander's desk by the door and into the bedroom area.

"Clearly not." Garrus whipped round on his heels, adrenaline coursing through his blue veins due to his agitated mood, and hovered his right hand by his pistol. "So?" Shepard stepped out of the bathroom with a towel wrapped tightly around his hips and pressed another to the back of his head and neck. "What was so urgent I couldn't even finish my shower without being raided?"

"Oh, shower. Right." What was the quickest way to make Garrus feel like an idiot? It just happened, pay attention! he was now stood next to Shepard's bed and staring at the man wearing a towel. His body glistened with water from the shower, and the man himself was blushing at the situation as well. "Well, I can stand outside until you're dressed first."

"Garrus?" Shepard side stepped into the anxiously retreating Turian's way and dropped the towel from his neck onto his desk. "Has something happened? EDI would have said if we were under attack. Is it the main batter? What's happened?"

Ok, his escape route was blocked. So being the stubborn fool he was, Garrus put mental blinkers on to Shepard's 'attire' and went for it.

"You tell me commander. What _exactly_ is the reason for you boycotting me from every mission? Why won't you even sit next to me in the mess hall? What exactly have _I _done?" Garrus jutted his hip to one side and folded his arms over his carapace. His brow plate lowered and his mandibles were tight to his face.

"...wait, you barged into my cabin because of that?!" Shepard scowled right back and stormed over to the door. "Damn it Garrus I thought something was seriously fucking wrong! Get the hell out and-"

"No." Slowly Shepard turned to face the furious sniper and felt the red mist rise in him as well.

"Excuse me?" Shepard pressed the door button, closing it so no one would hear the sound of a Turian getting a new asshole from the commander. "I think you just forgot who you were talking to. I'll say it again. Get-"

"Either tell me why you've been avoiding me, or I see no reason to be on this ship doing fuck all." That made Shepard flinch. Garrus never swore, not in English anyway. It sounded worse coming from a Turian, with his subtones making it sound so sharp at the edges. "Well?"

"I." Shepard swallowed hard, and closed his eyes. he was clearly trying to calm himself before he continued. "I haven't been avoiding you." was his opening line. "I've just been very busy and-"

"Bullshit." Garrus stalked over to the commander, actually contemplating swinging from him if he didn't start telling him the truth. That was how Turians sorted out their differences after all, with a good sparing with a hint of scrapping. Then surely they'd be friends again. "I tried to believe that you just didn't need me on missions 'at the moment'" he emphasised with two fingers on each hand. "But you can't even sit with me to eat, get in the same elevator with me, _and _you haven't been to talk to me in the main battery since the last time." Shepard squared up to the snarling Turian and put his fists on his hips. this movement sent a ripple through his muscular chest that Garrus couldn't help but notice. "Well?"

"Well _what_ Garrus?"

"Great, great!" He threw his hands up in the air and looked around them, like they had an audience. "Well what he says. At least you're not denying it. now, here comes the _reason_." He put his hands out, like he was saying 'over to you' for the next part.

"What do you want me to say Garrus?"

Ooo, that unnerved him a little bit. He didn't know what he was expecting, but this wasn't it. Shepard was just stood there, his arms down by his sides and his face sullen. His tone was sad at the edges, and he looked so...well not _vulnerable..._John Shepard was never _vulnerable_, but there was a crack in his armour.

"Have you been avoiding me because you came on to me and I didn't reciprocate?" the air hung around them like it wasn't safe to breathe near each other, and Garrus suddenly thought his 'have it out with him' strategy, wasn't such a good idea. He'd anticipated a bit of snarling, a few punches and then everything would be fine again, as it was before. but what he wasn't prepared for was his best friend turning his back to him and his shoulders sagging forward.

"That's...yes." he cleared his throat and walked over to his desk. Anything to put distance between them.

"But that's not fair." Garrus followed him, even when the commander sat in his chair and stared at the model of the original Normandy on his desk, he didn't back off. this was a lot more of a gently gently approach than he would have liked, but they were still going to sort this out. "I've had your back for _years_. I've never doubted you, I've always trusted you and I've always followed you into whatever hell you lead me into."

"I know Garrus." The man wouldn't look at him. Shepard always looked at him, right in the eyes, usually with a big grin over his chiselled features. But now he stared at anything but him, and his face was as blank as he could make it. there was still a hint of sadness there, in his steely eyes and slightly pressed lips.

"There is no one in this whole galaxy that I trust more than you."

"I feel the same way about you Garrus."

They shared a heavy silence for a moment. Garrus kept waiting for the good old Shepard to turn and grin up at him. but he didn't.

"Look Shepard." Garrus, all rage gone now, leaned a hip against the desk and leaned over to catch his heavy gaze. "I don't know what pissed me off more. That you've reacted like this, or that you didn't give me a chance to react."

"What do you mean?" the commander turned his face ever so, just looking at the Turian out of the corner of his steely eyes.

"I never thought any less of you. Sure, I was a little confused and caught off guard." Garrus turned to half sit on the desk and face the commander as much as he could. He folded his arms over his carapace and shrugged. "But you're still the one person in this whole damn galaxy I respect the most, and would still run half assed with no intel into a fire fight with." He chuckled, his deep subtones soothing the commander. "I was never going to be anything but professional about what happened, and you're still my best friend. What pissed me off the most was the fact that _you_ forgot that. You assumed that I'd-"

"That's not it." Shepard sat back in his chair and finally looked up into Garru's icy blues. "I knew you'd be professional about. I knew you'd still be my friend. I never once thought you'd file a sexual harassment suit against me or tell the rest of the crew Garrus." The Turian sighed and cocked his head to one side.

"Then why did you leave me high and dry?"

"Because I care too much about you." It seemed that Shepard was coming clean now, and wasn't going to hold back any more. "It was hard before seeing you nearly get blown to pieces, right after I got you back. I thought you weren't going to make it."

"Hay, people have tried to kill me for years!" Garrus chuckled, trying to cheer the commander up. "It's going to take a lot more than a missile to-"

"I love you Garrus. I have for a long time." The Turian's mandibles froze mid clatter, then slowly closed. Shepard was looking right up into his eyes. no hesitation. No doubt. But lots of fear. "I could almost ignore it before. but after I gave in and flirted with you, and you reacted the way you did, I can't ignore it anymore." He closed his eyes and sighed. "I have no expectations of you, and I won't act any differently, but I needed some time. and I didn't take you on missions with me as if I did, it would probably get me killed worrying and thinking about you."

"...oh."

Well, that wasn't what he was expecting. Shepard wasn't having a tantrum because Garrus didn't want him back. he wasn't trying to punish the Turian either. He was worried that if he had Garrus with him, the distraction of his heartache would get him killed.

Shepard got up suddenly from the chair and walked around Garrus. He went over to the wardrobe and opened it.

"I'll take you on missions again Garrus. As soon as I've..."

"Yeah."

"Could you...could you leave now?"

"Sure." Garrus slowly backed out of the room, and stood in the doorway. He was about to turn and let the doors close, when he heard it. it was the softest, saddest noise he'd ever heard. He lifted his head back up and saw the commander, stood in front of his wardrobe. One hand pressed against the metal door and the other held his face. He hardly heard a thing. A sniffle here, and a shaky breath there. he couldn't hear any sobbing or whimpering, but he could see Shepard's shoulders trembling.

_No wonder he couldn't take me with him on a mission. If I do __that__ to him..._

Feeling the guilty knot in his chest get every tighter and full of thorns as he watched his fearless leader, he tore himself away and stormed over to the elevator.

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"Erm, Garrus? What are you doing?"

"Research."

"...here?" Tali was stood next to the Turian sniper outside of a very...well it was a sex shop. "What for?" she turned to look up at him.

"That's private." He cleared his throat awkwardly, and continued to look inside the window of the shop, pressing his omni tool and browse what it contained.

"...who is it for?"

"Me, clearly." He groaned. "Haven't you got somewhere else to be?" he turned to look into the purple mask of his fellow dextro based friend, and heard her metallic giggle from her translator.

"Somewhere more interesting than you, looking in a sex shop? No way!"

"...fine." he huffed, his mandibles flapping slightly with the movement, and he returned to going through the omni-tool.

"Are you looking for vids or toys?"

"Perhaps I didn't make myself clear when I said this was _private_."

"Perhaps you don't realise how much attention you are getting stood outside a sex shop, staring in and going through your omni-tool like a pervert?"

Garrus glared down at the woman, and growled when he realised she was right.

"If you tell _anyone-_"

"If you continue to stand here much longer, there will be no one left for me to tell, who doesn't already know." She skipped ahead of him and pushed open the door. "After you."

"...I hate you sometimes."

"That is because I'm always right. Now. who is it for?" Garrus dropped his head in shame and pinched his nose, walking into the store after her.

"I can't tell you."

"Ok, species?" Tali shooed the Hanar shop assistant away and turned to smile through her mask at the sulking Turian.

"...human."

"Ok." She took his wrist and dragged him towards the blue section of the shop. It seems that there was a colour coded wall or panel for each species. "Now what are you trying to get her?"

Garrus licked the back of his mandibles awkwardly and looked around them.

"I need you to swear your secrecy to me." He whispered, using his sniper vision to check no one was near them or listening.

"...ok." Tali chuckled and leaned in to the conversation. "I swear on the home world not to tell a soul about this. Now, what are you trying to get her?"

"When I said I was doing research...I meant it. And I know how to be with women..." Tali put her hand up, like she was going to ask a question, then she staggered back and pointed at him instead.

"You mean your g-"

"No." He grabbed her petite shoulder and ragged her back towards him. "By the spirits this is embracing." He clattered his mandibles with annoyance. "Look." He whispered, making her lean in. "I'm not gay, but I'm doing research. I'm..._curious." _Garrus then yanked the woman in front of him and pointed at the wall. "Now, which of these vids will tell me what I need to know about...the mechanics of it?" slowly Tali leaned her head back to look up and the stiff-necked Turian, and started to quietly cackle at him.

"Well, today is your lucky day Garrus, I think I'm the biggest yaoi fan you'll ever meet!" she then rubbed her hands together and started pulling vid code boxes off the wall without reading the descriptions. "This is good, this one is romantic, this is hard-core, ooooo! This one, _this one_ has a Turian and a human in it." She was really excited about this, and Garrus was sweating buckets, looking around the store nervously. "Oh, and you'll need some of this dextro lube, and some anti-dextro allergy tablets for the human, and, oo! How to you feel about butt plugs?"

"Very badly." He took the vibrating box off her and put it back. "I said curious, not an expert Tali!" he hissed by her mask, but the Quarian skipped off towards the counter to pay. "Hay! Wait!"

"Thank you." she thanked the shop assistant and hooked arms with Garrus. "It's less suspicious if I hold the bag and charge it to my account." She whispered, leading them out of the door.

"Oh, right, of course." He cleared his throat again, and once again wished the ground would open up and swallow him.

Shepard and Jacob were walking back to the ship, carrying some specialist parts for the armoury, and stopped mid stride _just_ as Tali and Garrus came out of the sex shop.

Shepard and Garrus locked eyes, and Garrus nearly dropped Tali as he put his arms up. the sight of Garrus surrendering, like he was at gun point, made Shepard snigger into his hands.

"Jeez Garrus, it's not a crime to go into a sex shop." The commander broke into laugher and handed his bag to Jacob. "I'll catch up with you."

"Sure thing commander." Jacob continued towards the ship and chuckled as he walked up to his two dextro crew mates.

"So, Tali take you in did she?" he looked down at the large bag Tali was holding, and reached out for it. "Looks heavy, I'll take that for you Tali."

"What? No-uff." Tali elbowed him just under his carapace, and giggled loudly over his display.

"Thank you commander. When you're confined to a suit your whole life, you have to find _some_ _way _to have fun."

Tali walked in the middle of the two men, and caught them taking turns to steal glances at the other. She then looked at the bag Shepard was carrying, looked at Garrus and his nervous disposition, started doing the dot to dot in her head, and grinned wickedly behind her mask. "Well, thank you for that, but I'll take my bag now. ooops!"

Tali took the bag from the commander and 'accidentally' dropped it on the floor. The fornax manly mags and the various 'toys' and vids Tali had slipped into the basket, all came scuttling out onto the floor. Garrus turned very pale and dropped to his knees immediately. He energetically helped Tali put everything back into the bag and nearly pushed her over with the force he handed the bag back to her. "Thank you for helping me pick up my things Garrus. Oh, don't worry, the commander already knows I'm a _huge_ slash fan. Don't you commander?"

"Well, after that many whiskeys Tali, I think everyone _knows_." Shepard looked down at his ankles and saw a vid code box. He picked it up and saw the front. "Oh, I've seen this one." He blushed, looking to Garrus, realising what he just said. "Well, here, and I'll see you round." He handed Tali the box and hurried towards the elevator.

Once they were alone Garrus cracked one fist into the other hand and towered down over Tali.

"Tali-"

"I've seen this one too." Tali held the vid box up and shook it at him. It's based during the Human-Turian war. A Turian general captures a human special ops soldier and 'tortures' him for information. It's very good." She dropped it into the bag. "And very explicit. For anyone doing 'research into the mechanics of how to do it', there is _no_ room for the imagination." Tali beckoned her pale friend to follow her to the crew's cabins. Once outside his room she handed him the bag and blew him a cheeky kiss. "Now make sure if you're going to watch those vids on the main screen in there, you need to wear ear pieces for the sound. Or _everyone_ will know what you're doing."

"Tali." Garrus opened his door and stood half in, half out his room. "Thanks."

"No problem. Don't keep the commander waiting for long!"

"No I-wait-Tali!?"

The Quarian scurried off as fast as she could before Garrus could haul her ass in for questioning. It left the Turian holding his nose again as he slumped into his room. It was bad enough Tali knowing that he was curious about male on male 'action', without her knowing it was the commander he was really curious about.

Garrus locked the door, set up the display and ear piece in his visualiser accordingly and sat on his bed, prepared for anything. "It's just a documentary. Like you watch at the academy to learn how to infiltrate..."

As the vid continued playing before him, he slowly cocked his head to one side, inch by inch, his brow plate raising at the elaborate positions playing out in front of his eyes. "...that looks painful..."


	3. Garrus and Male Shepard part two

Ok, here is part 2 of Garrus and male Shepard, and yes, here is the smutty smutty goodness!

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"Commander, Garrus Vakarian as at the door. shall I let him in?"

Shepard looked up from his crew reports and rubbed the back of his neck, staring at the door. "Commander?"

"Yes EDI, please let him in." John put the reports down on the glass table and stretched his body against the corner sofa. He had abandoned his uniform a few hours back and now wore navy jeans and a black hoodie with the N7 symbol on it. He blinked his eyes a few times and watched the doors open. "Evening Garrus."

"Evening commander." _come on Vakarian. You're here now, get on with it._ "I didn't need to get my gun out this time."

"Well there really is no saying no to you, so why bother?" Shepard chuckled and sat forward on the sofa. "How can I help you Garrus."

For a moment, it was like everything was back to normal again. It put Garrus at ease, and he used this to will his body forward.

"You got a minute?"

"Sure, but I'm sure that's my line."

"Smart ass." Garrus sat down on the sofa next to him, but not too close. Shepard flashed his eyes over to a small bag Garrus had with him, noticing how the Turian tucked it behind him as much as possible. "About time you got some of your own medicine."

"Ooo, does this mean I get to ask _you_ for a favour? Since our roles are reversed I mean." They both chuckled and sat back against the sofa, tension gone.

"What, helping you hunt down and destroy the collectors and reapers not a big enough favour?"

"Well...we're doing that anyway, but I still run around after everyone's personal quests." Shepard shrugged, running a hand back over his very short black hair. "Where _do_ I find the time to save mankind?"

"Between explosions and visits to purgatory, naturally."

"True, very true. Now." Shepard got to his feet and walked towards his desk. "Beer? I have some dextro left over from Tali's last visit."

"Sure." Garrus then licked the back of his mandibles and shifted in his seat. "Is that when she had one of those slash-sessions with you?"

Shepard nearly fell over the step down to the living area with the drinks.

"She-she told you?!"

"Nope." Garrus grinned, lifting his mandibles smugly. "But you just did."

"You-bastard!" Shepard turned pink, a rare sight indeed, and returned to his seat. "Here."

"Thank you." Rather proud of himself, he pulled the straw from the size of his dextro-cider carton and stabbed it. Tali could only drink these as the cartons were sealed and the straws were sterile too. He sipped some of the sweet cider through the straw, refreshed by the taste.

He then opened his eyes to see Shepard was watching him. this caused him to blush, but he didn't give anything else away. "Listen Shepard."

"Ah, so we going to get to the point then?" Garrus put the carton down, not needing it to remain sterile like Tali, and turned to face Shepard. He rested his arm along the back of the sofa, his elbow hanging over the back and his hand close to Shepard's shoulder. His arms were folded over his chest, and his eyebrow raised at him. "You know I don't like games Garrus. What did you come for?"

"You're right. Games aren't my forte either." _Deep breath Vakarian. _"I've thought about..." he used his free hand to gesture between their bodies. "You and I and I have to admit, I think I was a bit pissed off with-"

"A bit? Garrus, you broke into my room and threatened your commanding officer with your resignation. You were more than pissed with me." Shepard chuckled and nodded his head at him. "But you had every right to be. It wasn't fair, but I've had time and I'm fine with-"

"No." Garrus pointed at him. "I mean-I'm glad we're friends again-but you didn't let me finish."

"Alright Garrus. Have at me then." John put his hands up and grinned at him. "I'll let you have your say."

"Good." The Turian cleared his throat and dusted off his blue and green casual suit matter-of-factly. "I was pissed off because you didn't let me have a reaction to your advances. I mean, come on, you went from talking to me about the suicide mission, to blowing off steam with me."

"But-"

"Now commander." Garrus crossed one leg over the other and pointed at him with a grin again. "You are letting me have my say, remember?" Shepard closed his mouth and sighed, nodding for him to continue. "Right. Well, it was only, you know, _afterwards _that I realised that you weren't into the ladies and _might _have had feelings for me. I wasn't upset about that. I was upset that you didn't give me a chance to think or feel anything about it."

"I know that, I just-"

"Commander Sheppard, I am going to gag you in a minute if you don't stop interrupting me."

"Oh fine." John huffed back against the sofa, putting his hands behind his head and closing his eyes. "Go on."

"So...after you _explained_ things to me last time, I did some research." Shepard opened his eyes, raised a brow and turned to look at him. "I like to be thorough before engaging in any potential mission. With all the facts and possible outcomes, I can actually _have _an opinion on how to proceed. And at the end of the day Sheppard, you are the person I care about the most."

"Garrus...I-"

"Alright, that's it." Garrus pulled the black bag from behind him and started rooting in it. "Where is the, right!" he pulled out a long black pice of satin material and put the bag on the table. "I warned you."

"But!-nfff!" Garrus grabbed the front of the commanders hood, yanked him over until he fell onto his back and gagged him.

"Now be quiet." Garrus sat on the sofa next to him, not touching him, but looking down at the stunned commander. "Hmmm, never been gagged before I see. Now where was I..." Garrus closed his icy blue eyes and tapped his chin. "...ah yes, my research. You see, at first I thought it wouldn't be something I could do, being with a man _or _a human. But then when I did my research, as long as you take the right amount of medication, particularly during fellatio on your part." He then chuckled. "Well no, _on_ my part, but I digress."

He winked down at the commander. "but other than that, there isn't much difference between human males and females to me. In fact, other than having a penis, a human male is quite like a female Turian. No breasts, strong hips and firm chest. If anything, a human female would be more different to a Turian female, than a human male." Garrus shrugged. "So once I got that sorted out in my head, I decided that I'd do more research. What goes where, and so on." he started gesturing with his hands. "Don't get me wrong. I'm not gay, and I don't have a fetish for humans, but I don't think I view you as either." Garrus leaned over and tugged the knot of the gag, and smiled down at the stunned spectre. "I think I just view you as John Shepard. The person I care about more than anything else. I never thought about you sexually before, but I want to try this with you."

John sat up and pulled the gag away from his mouth. The serious look in his steely eyes showed Garrus just how much he hung on his every word.

"Do you mean this? I mean, if you mean this then."

"I'm on top." Garrus pointed to himself and winked at the commander again. "I imagine you're _usually_ on top, being you, but the mechanics of doing it the other way round looked _really_ painful, and I'm not gay so-"

"You keep saying that." Shepard looked like he was close to reaching out for him, but something was holding him back. "As much as you reason it out, I'm still a man. You would be in a gay relationship if you were with me, as I'm not interested in just sex Garrus." He gulped. "I told you how I feel about you."

"I know." Garrus smirked his mandibles and grabbed the front of the commander's hoodie again. "I'll rephrase then. I'm not gay, but I'm more than happy to be gay with _you_."

"Oh." John allowed Garrus to reel him closer and kept going until he was sat on his lap. "Well, _that _I can live with."

"You better." Garrus leaned by Shepard's ear and brushed his mandibles against his cheek. "Because thanks to you, I can't think of anything else. Oh, and I hope you don't think this is going to go like the vids about Turians and human men, as there is _far_ too much leather and handcuffs involved." Shepard chuckled and unzipped his hoodie. Garrus had already slipped his hands up the back of his vest and pawed at his back. he felt the muscles flex under his palms, and traced teasing circles with his talons.

The hoodie landed on the black bag on the table, and was soon joined by the vest. Garrus sat back against the sofa, very comfortably, and smirking at the mess he was reducing the most formidable man in the galaxy to. He was making easy work of the commander's belt and fly, and trying hard not to laugh at the way Shepard kept feeling around his suit for a zip or any sort of opening.

"Oh for the love of-"

"You've never been with a Turian have you Shepard? All those vids, and no first hand experience." Garrus took his hands back and sniggered at the commander's expense.

"No. But I'll get in." In a very Jack-esc style, he revealed a pen knife from...who knows, and grabbed a fist full of Garrus' suit.

"Hold on there cowboy." The Turian put his hands up, surrendering, and pointed with one hand to his jacket. "See the fold there? pull it back." Shepard grumbled and yanked the panel under the start of the rim of his carapace, and saw a very discreet zip. "I'll take that." he negotiated the knife from the commander and threw it off to one side. "better?" he watched with a grin as Shepard yanked and pulled feverishly at his jacket, finally getting it off and pushing it down his shoulders. exposing his pale plating and brown flesh. "I thought I was horny watching all those vids, but you-oooooh." With his neck tie removed and his carapace exposed, Shepard wasted no time. His hands held the Turian's neck, sending a tremor of delight through his armoured body. "I'm sensitive there." He rasped, hearing a dark chuckle coming from human lover.

"I know. I've done research too." Shepard knelt over him and pressed his forehead to Garrus' briefly, before dipping down to suck hotly on the darker flesh under his jaw.

"Spirits!" Garrus hissed, trembling under his commander's assault of his neck, unable to resist. Shepard held him with the rim of his carapace and moved his groin to rest ontop of his. Not with his full weight, but enough to transfer heat to his loins. Giving him a moment of reprieve, Shepard pulled back and stared into his icy eyes, both panting from the intensity of it. "Why'd you stop?"

"This is the point of no return."

"Oh, is that all?" Garrus rolled his eyes and grabbed his shoulders, pushing Shepard to one side on the couch. He landed on his side and looked up with a hungry smirk as he saw that Garrus was crawling over him. "I think you'll find that was a little while back." He growled and pushed his trousers over his jutted hips and down his thighs. He then saw Shepard was pulling his jeans off and whilst watching him with fascination. "I thought you'd watched vids with Turians in them? You're staring like you've never seen a Turian's dick before." he snickered and kicked the rest of his clothing and boots off. he then helped Shepard do the same and saw the man had passed the stage of witty banter. Instead Shepard responded by leaning up on his elbows and pressing his lips to his mandibles.

That was an odd sensation for Garrus. His mandibles weren't solid, but they weren't as malleable as human lips. He opened his mandibles, in turn parting Shepard's mouth. The taste of beer on his breath brought something thundering to his attention. it made him pull back and look around for the bag.

"What? Garrus, what's wrong?"

"Hush princess." He mocked him, making the commander scowl. He shoved the hoodie and vest off the table, sighed with relief when he found the black bag, and rooted through it. He returned to hovering over the confused commander with a grin, and shook to packets at him. "I have your back in and out of battle. I wouldn't to kill you with my dextro cum, sir." He winked at the commander, who pretended to gag with disgust at the corny line, and pushed up on his carapace.

"Oh I can see this is going to be a pain in the ass already." John chuckled and took the packets off him. "Lube? Oh, the other one." He took an anti-dextro allergy tablet and swallowed it dry. He then made a show of turning over on the sofa, still underneath Garrus, and read the instructions on the lube packet. "Interesting. This apparently reduces internal chaffing too. very specific...ooooh."

"Oh, sorry, I was getting bored and thought I'd entertain myself."

Garrus was nipping and licking down his spine, one hand pressed into the sofa for support, and the other massaging his hip. John's back was littered with scars, all gained after Cerberus resurrected him. scars from bullet wounds, knife stabs and biotic pushes. Despite this...there was a ferocious beauty about the architecture of the commander. All rises and falls, smooth and soft, highlighted with scars and dancing muscles under his touch.

He drank in the squirming sight of the commander. "You're so sensitive John. I wasn't expecting that." he whispered into his skin tenderly, before nipping a little harder than he should have over his hip. "And soft. Even with all this muscle you're still squishy."

"I'm not squishy everywhere." Garrus nipped and kissed his way back up to Shepard's neck and saw what a state he'd turned his fearless leader into. He was pawing at the leather sofa, mewling with delight and he was whimpering as quietly as he could _and_ keep his manly pride. His steely blue eyes were drunk with desire and half open, looking over his shoulder at the Turian. This wasn't a waif of a man, or a feminine looking, but he had certainly surrendered to his advances. Something that Garrus imagined was very difficult for a man like Shepard.

"Oh?" the Turian nuzzled the crook of his neck and caressed his toned sides with the back of his fingers, letting them glide into the slight dip of his waist and down to his pumped thighs. "Where would that be then?" He grinned against the commander, licking the shell of his ear and loving the way he squealed with delight. He didn't even realise a man like Shepard _could_ make that noise. "Is it here?" he dragged his hand back up to grab John's right hip and pull it towards him. This lifted his ass up and pressed it against his groin. Garrus swore under his breath in Turian, his throbbing cock pulsing with delight at the warm contact. He almost lost his resolve when Shepard pushed up even more, rolling his hips against him. He held his hip tighter, pinching the skin with his talons. "Close, but not quite." he rasped and released his hip. He licked the back of Shepard's neck and held his lower navel. "Hmmm, yes, I think I'm getting closer." His hand slipped further down, and he felt the warmth of Shepard's cock against the back of his fingers.

"N-no." John grabbed his wrist and stopped it's advance. "It's alright like this. You don't have to touch my dick Garrus. You've already said you're not gay so-"

"Fuck off Shepard." Garrus rolled his eyes and leaned up, missing the heat of Shepard's body, but knew it was necessary. He took his hands off him as well and caused the man to panic. John turned onto his side and looked up at him. the fear that he'd been rejected flickered through his steely eyes. "Shepard, I thought about this in _detail _before I came to you, and I subjected myself to over 20 _hours_ of porn and instruction diagrams from Mordin to get ready for this." he then grabbed John's hip and flipped him onto his back. "We're doing this properly." He pressed his mandibles to Shepard's lips again and forced them open. He then slid his tongue into his mouth and licked experimentally at John's. The tension in the commander's body left him with a shuddered moan, and he held the back of the sniper's head, not letting him break off their kiss. His other hand pawed at his carapace, bringing his armoured body closer to his squirming one. "And for clarification." Garrus licked at his lips, nipped then and nuzzled at his neck. "I said I was gay _for you_, yes?"

"Oh Garrus!"

In this distracted state, he didn't see Garrus slip his hand down between them. He held their cocks together for a moment, enjoying the way Shepard gargled a moan through their sliding tongues, then started stroking them together. "Fuck!" Shepard arched his body against the sofa and into Garrus. The Turian saw an opening and latched onto his exposed neck, nipping and sucking hotly. He'd have many marks in the morning, but that meant he was doing his job properly. "I ah-getting close."

"Oh no you don't." Garrus released him and sat up, panting and looking down at the writhing man.

_This is the most terrifying and most skilled soldier I've ever seen. His prowess in battle is something of Krogan songs, and I'm making him moan like a woman._ Garrus smirked, enjoying the sight and the power trip. "Not yet." He licked and sucked a hot trail up the commander's stomach, between his pecks and up his neck, finishing with a cute nip of his chin. "Give me the lube commander." He growled, his subtones giving it a sexy vibration that seeped into John's body and made him comply. "Good spectre." He mocked him again, sitting up with a smirk and opening the packet. "Hmm, small bottle." He shrugged and squeezed half the clear liquid into his hands.

John watched, entranced. Garrus coated his long brown cock in the lube, making sure to give him a good show and a few pleasured grunts as he did so. He then smoothed a nice sheen of it over his groin plates and thighs. "'Says to put it everywhere we'll be having regular contact." He chuckled darkly. "So I'll need to put it here too." He squeezed the other half of the small bottle into his hand and took some off with his other fingers, rubbed them together, then grabbed Shepard's cock. He slowly covered it, feeling the heat and texture of his shaft. It was much like his own, being fleshy but hard. There was a large vein on the underside of it, and excess skin around the head. He swirled the head in his palm, making John pine and tremble all over. _So he's more sensitive there. I'll remember that._ "Oh, and here too."

There was no more bashfulness. Shepard shifted underneath him and bent his knees up, parting his legs and opening himself up for Garrus.

"Well? Get on with it before I take charge." Shepard was smirking, oh that smirk. He'd missed that devil-may-give-a-shit grin. Garrus rubbed his hands together, not realising that he looked like a cartoon villain about to reveal his dastardly plot, and then painted the commander's firm butt, ball sack and hole with the no-chaffing lube. He heard the sexiest noise in the universe when he crooked two fingers past his tight ring of muscle at his entrance. It was half way between an intake of breath and a cry of wanton desire.

It was then he thought just _how_ tight the commander was. _Guess I was right. He usually tops. _

And yet he hadn't tried to complain or convince Garrus _once_ to let him give. _Which means I'm going to take the commander's ass-virginity._ "Fuck Garrus, hurry up before I flip you!"

"You're not going to do that." Garrus teased him, pulling out his fingers and pressing the head of his cock against the entrance, but no further. He locked eyes with Shepard, and saw a fire burning there.

"Oh?"

A foot swung up and pushed at his carapace, hard. Garrus not only fell backwards, but fell off the sofa all together. He was still trying to shake off the shock of being bucked off, and so far away too, when he was mounted. There was a moment, a panic filled moment, when Garrus thought he'd changed the deal. The moment passed when John crawled up his body and made quick work of angling up his entrance to Garrus' burning cock. He even held it still as he lowered himself onto it. "A-aah!" This made Garrus grab his hip with one hand, and claw at the floor with the other.

"Faaaaaaaaccck."

"You should know better than to challenge me by now Garrus. I always win, remember?"

"Oooooh, I like the outcome commander." panting, the Turian licked his mandibles and watched his length slide up into John's ass. "Wha-spirits- I like it!" he grabbed both hips and held him at full hilt, helping John to adjust to his thick ridged cock, and brace his knees at either side of him. "Fuck, John, it's so-so wet in there."

"You did use loads of lube." John snickered, gritting through the pain and talking hold of the rim of his lover's carapace. He smirked, seeing how Garrus was loosing himself to the feeling of being inside him. His armour plated legs were twitching beneath him, and he had his eyes closed and mandibles open. Taking a deep breath, knowing it was going to hurt like hell for a while, he braced himself. "I'm going to move now."

"I don't think you can. I-I might die if you do."

"Tough." John smirked and leaned forward, rolling his hips up and down. He did so gingerly at first, then became entrapped with the sight of Garrus howling with delight. He kept moving his hands from clawing at the floor, to holding John's thighs (leaving scratches) and holding his own face. "Garrus." Shepard pulled his hands from his face and licked at his mandibles, grinding his hips up and down all the while. Insane with pleasure, Garrus snarled and grabbed the back of his lover's head with one hand, and his ass with the other. He then rocked them over and snarled in John's face. Low and constant, too deadly with intent to be called anything as tender as a purr. "Oooooh! Fuck-Ga-ah-ooh!"

Garrus lifted one of John's knees up and over his shoulder, using his weight to push the leg as close to Shepard's body as he dared. He began to piston his hips forward, the sound of skin slapping against his plating echoed around the room. Desperation drove them both. Hands touched each other's faces, chests, necks and everywhere else they could reach. Tongues danced and teeth nipped. They tasted each other's sweat and Garrus left scratches and sucked love bites down his neck, shoulders and chest. The ferocity of their love making was so wild, so powerful, it wasn't hard to see why there was a risk of chaffing.

John was just so wet and hot inside. The heat was damning enough, but it was how soft the human was that drove Garrus insane. No matter how he moved, his walls melded to the shape of his cock, soft and quivering all around him. All of his body did that, bending into whatever position Garrus put him into. He turned his face to look at the leg he was holding over his shoulder and gave him a deep love bite just above his knee for good measure.

John didn't even register the pain of the bite, he was lost in torrents of passion, holding onto his lover for dear life as he was ground into the floor.

"Touch yourself." John snapped his love drunk eyes open and panted up at the Turian. "Now." he commanded, feeling he couldn't hold on for much longer. Shepard licked his lips and began stroking himself under the Turian's intense gaze.

"I-I'm going to cum Garrus."

"Good." Garrus went for it, crashing his hips into his soft warm human and found his new favourite noise in the whole universe.

"OOoooooooo GOD!" John arched against him and cried out with deep delight. The writhing and tightness of his ass was too much. Garrus growled and came inside his commander, holding onto him tightly as sparks of his release rippled through his body.

"John, ah!". He whimpered with the force of it, panting and clinging to John. He'd never tell him, for fear of his ego swelling, but that was the most intense orgasm he'd ever had. It was a good few minutes before he even opened his eyes and lifted his heavy body off his lover.

They stared into each other's eyes, knowing their relationship had forever changed. Neither said it, but they _knew_ that wasn't going to be the last time they laid together.

"So...comfortable?"

"Huh?" John chuckled up at the confused, sex addled mind of his Turian lover.

"Well, usually you pull out afterwards. You're still in to full hilt, and you still feel hard. You _did_ cum, didn't you?"

"Of course." Garrus snickered. He was on his hands and knees, but they were very much still joined. "You see, that was one of the things I meant earlier, when I said this wasn't going to go like your porn vids." He sniggered, licking at John's cheek. "They always seemed to miss out the knotting afterwards."

"Knotting?" Shepard, imagining weird and wonderful things happening inside of his ass, and looked down between them.

"Relax Shepard." Garrus winked and licked at his lips. "It's a Turian thing. We're evolved to, well, 'swell' afterwards. Designed to well, erm, 'plug' in the semen to increase chances of pregnancy in females."

"Wait, so you're telling me." John folded his arms over his chest and looked up at Garrus with narrowed steely eyes. His attempt to look pissed off was voided by the soft blue hue the fish tank covering him . Garrus thought about mentioning this, then thought better of it. "That your cock has swollen in my ass, and we're stuck like this? For how long?!"

"Well, a few minutes. Don't worry princess, you're not going to be _inconvenienced_ for much longer."

"Hay, that's the second time you've called me princess." John poked his carapace, sulking. "I'm not a woman, so don't call me girly names."

"But you squeal like a girl." Garrus just smirked and winked down at his commander.

He regretted it moments later.

"Oh, you do _realise_ you're _attached_ to me right now, right? No escape and all?!"

"Well-" John fainted his fist forward, making the Turian flinch. "Wait! Lesson learned commander!"

"That's better." Garrus had his eyes closed, and only opened them when he felt a pair of warm, soft lips on his mandibles. "Thank you Garrus, for trying with me."

"Well you're welcome."

"Are you mocking me again?"

"I wouldn't dare commander." Garrus chuckled and licked at his lips, smirking as John instinctively opened his mouth and licked up his tongue. "I would never mock my boyfriend, no matter how cute he is."

"Wait." John held his lover's face, feeling the 'swelling' inside him going down. "Do you mean that?"

"I told you John." Garrus pressed his forehead to Shepard's, sighing with content. "I thought long and hard about this. why would I come to you after all this, knowing how you feel, if I wasn't ready to return your affections?" John said nothing. He kissed Garrus so intimately, no words were needed. Even when Garrus was able to pull out of him, and did so, the pair didn't leave each other's arms until the metal floor was just too cold. Then they took their tender embrace to the bed, and held each other with serene smiles. That night Shepard had no nightmares, and Garrus felt like there were no nasty surprises in their future.

If only it ended up that way.


End file.
